To much time on my hands

Damn I have not really kept up with this blog and I don't know why. I have all the time in the world to do it because I am on disability and don't really have a lot of responsabilities. I have been disabled for a few years now because of cancer and bad back and other assorted illnesses, some of which are at bay and others that still bother me big time. I have had some training in Web Design and computer graphics and I want to get back into that field and all that stands in my way is myself. This blog, my web design and graphics is what I need to get me back on my feet and headed in the direction that I want to go, but I just cant seem to make myself sit down and just do it. I have gotten into a rut so bad that I just go from day to day and do the things that everyone does like watch tv, eat, play games on the PSP and PS2, clean the house, feed and care for my animals, run to the bank and go shopping and all the things that go with just being me. But this is not what I want! I want to get back into web design and creating graphics for the web and make a decent living doing this. I know what I have to do and have all the tools to do it but I just cant seem to do it! Damn this is really bothering me I would go back to school if I could and that would give me a kick in the ass to get going, but the tuition and gas $$$ to get to and from class are really not in my budget at the moment. So I must make myself learn on my own, I have done this before so it would be just refreshing what I already know and then moving to advanced design and learning more as I go. So I have made up my mind, I have the book "HTML Utopia: Designing Without Tables Using CSS" by Rachel Andrew & Dan Shafer from Sitepoint. I must read and study this book! If I did I would be right back to where I left off before I became ill and well went in some different directions with my life. So starting tomorrow er well today Feb 7, 2008 I will start reading this book and practicing my HTML and CSS and take what I learn and build me a web site. I must do this if only for my own sanity! Yes I will start to study this book today!!! Because I have to much time on my hands and it's ticking away with my sanity!